It was around 7:15 when she interrupted my class...I remember her clearly....wearin jeans, a white blouse and a black leather jacket when she came in and apoligized for being late....a true beauty just walked into my 2nd level class at Quick Learning....and I struggled to teach the rest of my class without staring at her constantly...I dont remember anything else about that class that particular day...just that 3 hours later it was finished and she walked out my class as I dismissed the rest of the students she walked out in a hurry....and I had to run to catch her downstairs and outside waiting for someone...I approached her and asked why I havent seen her before...and she told me that she had missed classes the whole week at the other branch near her house... in Ecatepec....so she came to Lindavista to catch up....I mustered the courage to as her for her number and told her I would be waiting for her next class the following week....then she left....walked away...heels clicking on the pavement....I remember that day clearly as she jumped into a truck and dissappeared out of my sight.
She didnt come back for months...and I didnt call her I couldnt find the words....if I did call her that is...until she came in one Saturday...it was a long day I wasnt teaching 2nd level I was teaching 8th level but during the breaks we would talk...and she would laugh...it was like music to my ears...her smile the way her eyes sparkled when she laughed...it was a beautiful sight...and at 3:30 when classes were done I invited her to eat at the mall near the school...and to my surprise she accepted....but she said she had to leave quick cuz she had a birthday party to go to...well we didnt leave the coffee shop until 6pm...we just talked and talked and talked about nothing and everything....and we could have gone for more hours...but she said it was a bday party for a family of her boyfriend at that time....who she wasnt so much in love with anymore....but felt a commitment to....so she left.....I kept on seeing her and we kept on talking for a while until I told her what I felt everytime I saw her and everytime she didnt come how I always expected her to show up...it was funny how she told me that I told her that to all the girls at the school...which was partly true..come on I was a teacher with bunch of students....it was heaven for me....but with her it was different...and I let her know that....she just smiled.....
All of a sudden she left......I didnt see her for months....and I called her house and her mom told me she had taken off to Chicago to work and live...she didnt even say goodbye....and we talked and she had said she was sorry I didnt know for what until that moment....she left it hurt me but I called her mom every other week to ask if she had called and if she did to tell her I said hi and that I missed her....her mom didnt even know me but she was nice enough to pass the message along....I kept doing that for about 6 months until one night she called me and said that she was gonna stay in Chicago for another 6 months and to forget about her...I told her that I couldnt ....it was impossible and that I would wait for her....and wait I did of course I didnt stay celibate...things changed in my life I changed jobs went to work to the best job I ever had....I had gone to Phoenix thru the desert illegaly and came back and had a so called girlfriend (thats another story) who I left when I went to Arizona and then when I came back...found a job in RCI and still kept calling Anahis` house just to check on her.
My heart skipped a beat when I called her home and it was she who answered the phone and not her sister or her mom...and told me she had came back....damm the was the best feeling in the world, undescribable....it was around september....and we immediately started seeing each other....catching up on things, she telling me about chicago and me telling her about my adventures thru the desert and it was great because we could talk about so much and for hours in a day...I remember clearly when I came to stay on a trip to Velas and Grand Velas for a week she called me upset cuz I hadnt called her it was great to me, cuz I knew she felt something...and as soon as I went home I told her to be my girlfriend which she said NO...she wasnt ready....that sucked....it was horrible...but I didnt give up and I invited her to my Birthday vacation....in Acapulco she said yes....it was awesome we stayed at the Mayan Palace....and all my close friends were there....Fernando Abrego, his girlfriend at that time, my sister Karla and her best friend Jessica and all my family that lives in Acapulco...we partied but most of all I was happy cuz I was with the most beautiful woman hands down...I had eyes for no other woman....
We were in our room a 3 bedroon suite at the Mayan Palace my sister and her friend in one room and Ana and I in ours....we had slept together and kissed but had done nothing yet....I was nervous like i it were my first time...and we were kissing and caressing each other oh dear god how I wanted to take her at that moment but she said no yet again....but to me it was fine I was willing to wait until she was ready and we didnt do anything that night...needless to say I got blue balls...but I guess that was it for her...she understood I wasnt just trying to get on her pants...and when we went back to the city she agreed to be my girlfriend in a parking lot under a mall...
She was crying when she said yes...and thats how our relationship started...and needless to say our first time was great in a small town we when for the weekend with scented candles and all....but I think thats when my insecureness started when she said yes i was fine when we were not bf and gf but she was beautiful and I was insecure so I started becoming jealous we lasted a while but I always blamed her for us breaking up but I have to tell the true story of me and my insecureness and the most stupid thing I ever did in my life....
Before I do that I want to make it clear that we were great together we did many things together, visited many places together and her family welcomed me in her house parties we when to...with her sister and her friends and it was great...she was and probably still is the best....person I have ever been with....with the most noble heart and beautiful beyond measures at least to me she was...
I was already being jealous telling her she was with someone else...and shit like that...but she wasnt it was me being insecure...and the most stupid thing I ever did...
Well...one day I bought a balloon saying I love you and I took her to her job and left it on the windshield of her car...and left, I called her and told her I would be coming to pick her up and we should go to the movies....and I arrived early waited by her car with and angry look on my face and started making a fuzz about the balloon...the balloon I had left....to this day I dont know why I did that...but she denied it of course and we got into an argument a pointless argument...and we broke it off...I went to a hotel upset angry at her and I called her and told her I would kill myself and acted like I did....well....that ended a relationship that could have been going on to this day....because of me....me being INSECURE and we parted ways.....she traumatized by my drama....and we are not in talking mode to this day...I mean we have talked I spoke wit her about 1 year and a half ago...but now she is married and I heard she has a child, she got married to an architect....which in a way is best for her.Me, I think thats where my spiral downward begin...I had a great job I left it moved to cancun moved back to the city and then moved to Vallarta...and here I am writing this something I should have done long ago....
So Ana, if you ever read this...know that you will forever have a special place in my heart....although Im pretty sure you are over me I will always wish you the best in life...and if you ever want to talk again...you know how to find me....let me be clear on something...I am over you too..but I guess I just had to get something of my chest this big....although you knew...and like you told me I am the one that taught you how to love...you are the one that made me be more secure....it was something I learned afterwards and too late but I learned and like I said you will always be remembered and in my heart
So there you go....that is the story of my life......there is a picture of both of us in better days....
This was beautiful, Tim. It reminds me of a relationship I had - this would be his almost exact perspective too. I only know because he told me.
ReplyDeleteYou are such an exquisite writer.
~Angela
Thank you
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